The Dreaded "C" Word

"That wont happen to us."

That's the thought that was circling my mind while Austin and I were watching "The Period of Purple Crying." It was required for us to watch before we could take Landon home from the hospital. I thought to myself, "Only crazy people who don't love their kids would ever shake their baby to death." I also thought Colic was something that only happened other people, not us. While we were watching the movie, Austin turned to me and said, "If our kid cries like that, I will shoot myself." I told him that wouldn't happen, our baby was perfect.

I'll tell you that video is worthless.

The very first night we brought Landon home, Austin, along with my sister, took the night shift so I could sleep. I awoke at 5am, to horrible crying. I walked into the nursery only to find Austin, sitting in the rocking chair trying to calm our son. He had been up all night with a terribly cranky baby, and he couldn't figure out what was wrong, he just kept crying. I told Austin to go to bed and I would try to calm our baby. I put him in his cradle swing and he slept for about 3 hours. I thought it was no big deal, newborns cry, that's just how it is.

But it didn't get better. Every day, every night, we would spend hours trying to calm our baby. The kind of cry was excruciating to listen too. It was the kind of cry that chilled you to the bone. You could tell he was in pain but we just couldn't help him.We found one thing that worked every time, and that was swinging him in his car seat, fast and high. I got blisters on my hands from endless nights of swinging. We tried soy formula, expensive hypoallergenic formula, goats milk, different brands. We tried gripe water, bottles that were supposedly "made" for Colic, we even took him to a Chiropractor that said he could cure colic. I read everything I could get my hands on about colic, thinking I could find an answer. We wasted so much money on things that never worked, but I would have paid millions to have my baby happy.

The worst was when I would try to visit friends who's babies were the same age as Landon, and they would be so happy, never cried, cooed and smiled at their moms. And Landon would cry during the whole visit. I felt like I was missing out on enjoying mommyhood, like he would never stop crying. My baby was hurting, and I couldn't help him. I was living in a nightmare.

I thrived on the brief moments when Landon was happy. I looked forward to those times when I could cuddle him in silence.

When Landon was about 2 months old, it dawned on me that Austin, along with his brother and my brother, were lactose intolerant. They would get horrible stomach aches whenever they drank milk. I thought, that's it. I drove to to the store and bought Similac Sensitive, in the liquid form. I immediately saw a difference. Within a week, I had the happy baby I had always longed for. I was in heaven! I praised God for finally allowing me to enjoy mommyhood.

I also couldn't have done it without my mom and sister. They came whenever I called, they took Landon so I could sleep. I honestly don't know how I would have made it through without them.

I will be posting more on Colic, and what I learned from it tomorrow.